When Your Child... Is Scared of Spooky Things
Q: Ever since my daughter (age 9) accidentally saw a trailer for a scary movie, she’s been terrified of all things Halloween. She hates pumpkins, black cats, witches’ hats, and especially masks of any kind. Her friends are all looking forward to the school Halloween festival, which includes a haunted house. My daughter has had a bunch of teary melt-downs because she’s torn between her fear of the spooky stuff and her fear of missing out on fun with friends. Some of her friends are also encouraging/pressuring her to come, insisting that the festival is fun and the haunted house is not that scary. How can I help my daughter figure out what to do?
Some children love spooky things. Just like with roller coasters, they enjoy the thrill of danger in the context of safety. Other kids, often those with particularly vivid imaginations, are just plain scared by spooky things.
Your daughter seems stuck, pulled between two negative outcomes: either she has to be terrified or she has to separate herself from her friends.
Let’s try to peel away the layers of this problem to see if we can expand options beyond this painful either/or.