How NOT to Raise a Narcissist
What research REALLY says about narcissistic children
You’ve met that child: The one who insists on special treatment, who thinks the rules don’t apply to them, who brags and seems insensitive to anyone else’s feelings or wishes, who has loud, public tantrums if they don’t get their way… This child may have some superficial charm, but if you spend much time with them, you walk away feeling irritated and thinking, “Who do they think they are?!” Or worse.
Young children are naturally (and adorably) self-focused and have unrealistically positive views of their abilities. When a three-year-old says, “Watch me do my big jumps!”, this reflects an age-appropriate delight with new abilities and desire for parental approval. Around seven years of age, children become able to compare themselves realistically to their peers. For most children, this leads to a drop in overall self-esteem. For some, it’s the beginning of a narcissistic view of themselves.
What does narcissism in children look like?
Sander Thomaes and his colleagues developed the Childhood Narcissism Scale. Items include:
